The NFL is world-renowned for its marketing prowess, displaying a deft advertising hand that has taken the league to the apex of popularity in America. Ever hungry, the NFL in recent years has looked overseas, playing pre- and regular season games in Mexico, England and Canada. By and large successful, this international expansion will be put to the test next week when a nuclear blast of suck is sent across the pond to Wembley Stadium, where the Tampa Bay Buccaneers will take on the New England Patriots.

Look up "mismatch" in the dictionary, and the definition is going to mention this game. I don't care if it's the original 1828 edition of Webster's Unabridged, there will be a crude woodcut of Josh Freeman on his back. And yes, I did have to look up who the hell their current QB is, because no one, including Tampa Bay's coach, knows the man's name off the top of his head. To illustrate, Tampa Bay is 0-6 this season while the Pats just laid a 59-0 smack-down on Tennessee this week. This is worse than Washington Generals v. Harlem Globetrotters, this is like playing against the Lions in Madden on "Rookie."

Speaking from a personal standpoint, I hope both teams somehow find a way to lose; my hatred of the Pats is well-documented, and I still harbor a grudge against Tampa Bay from the time of the 2003 Super Bowl. Much as I think the Bucks suck a fat one, this is not the way for them to catch an ass-whupping. This is not a game to export to an allied country; the Taliban and/or al-Qaeda are the only ones who deserve to be subjected to this suck-fest.

If the NFL is looking to expand their international popularity, why send this game over? The rest of the world has since the post-WWII years been the dumping ground for our cultural garbage, from McDonald's to 80's butt-rock, and is presumably quite sick of it. To endear the English to American football, send an exciting game over, not something that amounts to a 60-minute prison rape. Seriously, is the league looking to undo four years of international hype-building by FedEx-ing a crate of dog shit to Wembley? For the love of God, call it a mercy killing and just award this game to the Pats; don't make the Bucs and the British populace suffer through this.